Mixed-Orientation Marriage: Pathways to Success

Cass Model Revisited – A bisexual perspective

The Cass model is one tool to help us understand our bisexual, gay or lesbian identity development. Originally developed by Vivian Cass to show homosexual identity development there are similarities in our bisexual identity development.  While I support the use of models to understand complex identity processes  there are aspects of models such as the Cass model that affect their relevance.   For example our coming out and processes we go through in our bisexual or gay identity development   is often not linear, For example I was in both the identity pride and the identity synthesis stage for a number of years. Another consideration is this model was written in a different time in the history of LGBTQ+ acceptance and there is some belief that increased acceptance of being gay has made some of these stages very different for some. While the early stages might happen faster due to increased acceptance of gay individuals progress for bisexual acceptance in our society has been slower so in some cases the Cass model is still very relevant for the bisexual. As the Cass model was not originally designed for bisexual identity development I have added my own notes      The notes I have added to each stage are my opinion and observation on my experience as a bisexual who went through these stages over the course of several decades and are not research based.

The Cass Model – Here is a brief A summary of the model set forth by Vivian Cass first published in an article entitled Homosexual identity formation: A theoretical model. Journal of Homosexuality, 4(3), 219-235.
Remember to substitute the word bisexual for gay as you read these stages.
Identity Confusion
In the first stage, Identity Confusion, the person is amazed to think of themselves as a gay person. “Could I be gay(bisexual)?” This stage begins with the person’s first awareness of gay or lesbian or (bisexual) thoughts, feelings, and attractions. The people typically feel confused and experience turmoil.

My Notes as a bisexual: Bisexuals have an especially difficult time with the identity confusion stage  because their answer to “Could I be gay?” is well yes I could but I continue to have heterosexual feelings and attractions which contributes to the confusion. At this stage the bisexual may not even be considering a non-binary straight/gay  straight/lesbian making it even more difficult to reconcile the conflicting attractions to more than one gender.

Identity Comparison

The second stage is called Identity Comparison. In this stage, the person accepts the possibility of being gay or lesbian (or bisexual)  and examines the wider implications of that tentative commitment. “Maybe this does apply to me.” The self-alienation becomes isolation. The task is to deal with the social alienation.

NOTES: This alienation is magnified for bisexuals because of the tendency of most of those we see to classify as either gay/lesbian  or straight. Most of us studying bisexual identity development are very aware of the ABB (Anything but bi) problem. That is there is widespread reluctance to adopt the bisexual identity and all kinds of other names have come up.  Bisexuality is looked on least favorably of the sexual minorities and appears to me to be widely  misunderstood with a lot of false stereotypes. This increases the sense of isolation and makes the identity comparison stage a challenge. They accept the possibility of being bisexual but it may take longer to adopt this identity. At least one study confirms this delay in bisexual identity acceptance compared to other sexual orientations.

Identity Tolerance

In the third stage, Identity Tolerance: the person comes to the understanding they are “not the only one”. The person acknowledges they are likely gay or lesbian and seeks out other gays and lesbians people to combat feelings of isolation. Increased commitment to being lesbian or gay. The task is to decrease social alienation by seeking out lesbians and gays.

Notes: Identity tolerance  of course applies to bisexuals but there is the added difficulty that they really are not totally accepted with either the gay or heterosexual community. In addition we do not really have a readily available bisexual community to reach out to. Since this model was originally developed there are now online bisexual communities that help with with this stage but real world bisexual communities are difficult to find.

Identity Acceptance

The Identity Acceptance stage means the person accepts themselves. “I will be okay.” The person attaches a positive connotation to their gay or lesbian identity and accepts rather than tolerates it. There is continuing and increased contact with the gay and lesbian culture. The task is to deal with inner tension of no longer subscribing to society’s norm, attempt to bring congruence between private and public view of self.

Notes- This stage is a milestone The bisexual finally accepts that same gender and other gender  desires are a perfectly normal part of who they are. The shame has lifted. I agree with Cass that our great challenge here is the private/public view of self. I cover invisibility and erasure in another article but it really is a challenge to have those around us also accept who we really are because they can’t see it.

Identity Pride

In the identity pride stage, while sometimes the coming out of the closet arrives, and the main thinking is “I’ve got to let people know who I am!”. The person divides the world into heterosexuals and homosexuals, and is immersed in gay and lesbian culture while minimizing contact with heterosexuals. Us-them quality to political/social viewpoint. The task is to deal with the incongruent views of heterosexuals.

Notes. My experience here is that this stage is very different for bisexuals. We do not wish to minimize our contact with heterosexuals so much as increase our contact with others who share our same sex attraction. We also are looking for acceptance into both communities and often end up feeling not part of either. Sort of a sense of all dressed up and no place to go. Groups such as Transcending Boundaries Inc are working to build a community for those that do not fit the gay straight binary.

Identity Synthesis

The last stage in Cass’ model is identity synthesis: the person integrates their sexual identity with all other aspects of self, and sexual orientation becomes only one aspect of self rather than the entire identity.

The task is to integrate gay and lesbian identity so that instead of being the identity, it is an aspect of self.

Notes this stage applies to bisexuals as well but I think there is a challenge in leaving behind the pride stage. We need to maintain a certain amount of pride and openness to maintain our visibility. I feel that identity synthesis is a goal to be strived for but that until society has an accepting attitude towards bisexuals there will always be a need to speak up about this unique aspect of ourselves.

Posted by Mark March 20,2011 at Livingfabulous.org Reposted here at Mixed-Orientation Marriage Musings 2/2/2021

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References

Cass, V Homosexual identity formation: A theoretical model. Journal of Homosexuality, 4(3), 219-235.

Source of abbreviated summary on Cass model http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cass_Identity_Model